Friday, July 18, 2008

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

looking back I never would of thought I'd feel this way..but in all honesty I can't do it anymore..I don't see any hope for her, I don't think her life will get any better as she grows up...she asks for help and I thought maybe she had matured but she doesn't take her pills, she lies about peeing the bed...and overall she is just a miserable unlikeable person..a psychiatrist's, a counselor and a year and a half straight of therapy, numerous medical tests...it is not going to change a thing..it disgusts me to no end..it breaks my heart because she was planned, she was wanted, she was loved...I sat by her incubator for a week praying that she wouldn't die..and she lived but she's not really living...she knows no love, no empathy, no friendship, no loyalty nor trust..no patience no kindness no charity...she is self centered, uncaring, hateful, hurtful, distrustful and selfish.. the time has come to find her someplace else to live..I don't want to spend what little time I have left on earth with such a miserable person...I've looked into boarding schools, military schools and a youth home...a permanent decision will be made before the other kids go back to school..nothing short of a miracle would help her..it's sad because she is young, has a whole life ahead of her so much wasted potential....but it's sad to say I don't know if anyone would miss her

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